http://cam-hofi.blogspot.com/2013/09/one-heart-two-places.html
I get it. She'll do fine.
Life is hard. Life is wonderful. I miss so much. I have so much.
Showing posts with label cambodia. Show all posts
Showing posts with label cambodia. Show all posts
Thursday, September 19, 2013
Wednesday, September 18, 2013
I don't have an anniversary, because today didn't really exist.
A year ago yesterday it was raining when I woke up, and I ran outside to save my already soaked clothes from the line. The clothes that I didn't pack into a plastic bag and stuff into my suitcase, I left with my roommate. When the rain ended she put the clothes back on the line. I don't know how long they were there, but those clothes are pretty sun-bleached.
A year ago yesterday, I said goodbye to jeans for 3 months. When I came back, they didn't fit right.
A year ago yesterday, I pulled almost all the money I was going to use for the next 4 months out of my bank account. I was afraid to interact with my bank account after that.
A year ago yesterday, I got into a truck with a woman I didn't really know as she drove me to the airport. Actually, with 3 women that I didn't really know. The driver I still don't, the others I came to.
A year ago yesterday, we got pulled over in the truck. The cop let us go because we were on our way to do service work. God blesses us every day.
A year ago yesterday, I used my passport for the first time. It was definitely not the last.
A year ago yesterday, I made one last phone call and got one last text before I turned my phone off for 3 months. When I opened it 3 months later, I hadn't missed any calls or texts.
A year ago yesterday, I had the best meal on a plane that I'd ever had. Up to that point. It's a toss-up now.
A year ago yesterday, I flew over Japan. I hummed a little 'happy birthday' to my cousin who is still serving his mission over there. It's his birthday here today.
A year ago yesterday, I landed in the Korean airport and hand-printed a page out of the a Korean early learning book. I still have that. I'm going to hang it in my home.
A year ago yesterday, was the first time I had Pho. It was also the last time I would pay $4 for gellato. The spices I got used to. I miss them now.
A year ago yesterday, was the first time I'd heard Korean instruments live.
A year ago yesterday, I landed in an airport where I didn't speak any of the languages that were written on the bathroom signs. It got better as the airport went on.
A year ago yesterday, I got my first passport stamp. And a signed visa.
A year ago yesterday, I was greeted lovingly by people I had never seen before. People that absolutely loved me. They greeted us in voices that defied all logic. High and nasal, but clearly audible from a distance.
A year ago yesterday, I had dragonfruit for the first time. It was pink, not white.
A year ago yesterday, I slept on the firmest mattress I had ever imagined. I slept well. I can't say that for all of the nights I slept there.
A year ago yesterday, I was the farthest away from home than I had ever been. I was the farthest away from a temple that I ever hope to be.
A year ago yesterday, my impulsive idea became my life. A spontaneity that cost a lot, and was worth every cost.
A year ago yesterday, I was more nervous to go to school than I had ever been. And I was the teacher. I had nothing to run with.
A year ago yesterday, was the last day for months that I would be surrounded by people who spoke my language. And I haven't spoken nearly as much since.
A year ago yesterday, I was dropped into a culture that I didn't understand. But I love.
A year ago today, I shared a bed with someone else for the first time since I'd left home.
A year ago today, I spent 45 minutes buying a bike. It didn't really fit. And the roads were unbelievable.
A year ago today, it was the first time I rode my bike to my new 'job'.
A year ago today, I met the most heart-breaking children ever. They break my heart every day. Broke it even more when it was there.
A year ago today, I played with God's most vibrant souls. And they played with me.
A year ago today, I stopped hearing fluent English.
A year ago today, I went to my first market. I got used to the flies.
A year ago today, I witnessed the sweetest Primary song performance.
A year ago today, I learned names that I couldn't pronounce.
A year ago today, I began a very grand adventure.
A year ago today, I was naive.
A year ago today, I was excited. Beyond anything I'd ever thought.
A year ago today, I was terrified. Bringing meaning to things that are "Great and Terrible".
A year ago today, I moved into my new room.
A year ago today, it was hot like you wouldn't believe.
A year ago today, I unpacked my suitcase and my clothes were a little wet still from the rain that was....
somehow 2 days ago.
But if that was today
and the other is farther than nearer
than the ones in the middle didn't really happen right then.
But if that puts those today,
would Today be tomorrow?
And then Yesterday would be today.
But some of yesterday really was Yesterday.
Yesterday felt like it was one day, not two.
Today felt like two days,
Two years,
Two worlds.
Sometimes Today feels so close.
It could be Today today!
Yesterday always seems far away.
Today's heroine is different than Yesterday's.
Other times, Today feels like a dream.
Something imagined out of Eat. Pray. Love.
But I didn't see Eat. Pray. Love. until I was in Today's world.
It's a weathered door to foggy memories.
They're all dreams
Until I bow at the checkout counter
And a small child clings onto my leg.
It may be that today is really tomorrow,
But it can be Today for me.
Tuesday, July 9, 2013
touchy-feely post
about all the things I've learned.
It also happens to be my 199th post.
I was in Hamilton, New Zealand exactly 6months after the day I left Cambodia. I realized it as I was making a GoPro video, walking around the Hamilton Temple. "Hey, remember when we did this in Korea?" And I did. I remembered the exact day. December 13, 2012 (the first one).
I thought again of all the things that I had learned from that time to this.
I learned how to really fast.
It was the day that Natalie left. McKae was already getting sick and we'd forgotten that it was Fast Sunday the day before, so I fasted on Monday. Mostly for McKae because I didn't want to be left alone, I wanted her to be better. I didn't eat or drink all day, until about 7 in the evening. I was praying with part of my brain and teaching with the other part; and when Natalie offered me something to eat I almost refused because I wasn't very hungry.
I learned to be exceptionally self-driven.
I have learned how to keep better tabs on people.
I treasure my interpersonal relationships more.
I'm more aware of what lasts.
I learned to do hard things...in a different way than I had before.
The first time I cried in Cambodia was about 2 weeks after McKae had returned home. I'd made skype appointments that had all fallen through, and I was waiting for another one. I was signed in and the person on the other side of the line was late. I hadn't skyped someone on the island for about a month and it was a little nerve wracking. To distract myself from distress, I signed onto facebook and the first thing I saw was my friend Jodi's comment on a picture I'd posted, asking if there was anything I needed from the island. There wasn't, and we weren't sure of the mail security, but I was so touched and just grateful that there was still someone who knew they could do something to make sure I was okay, and they wanted to. I wasn't okay, but after seeing that I was. That was a really big thing for me.
I learned to be independent with God.
So many of the experiences in Cambodia I've seen come into play within these 6 months following that adventure. Little things where it's like "Why on earth would this be important" have been useful and have made worlds of difference.
My friend Martin is currently in the Ivory Coast working with an organization called WELL Africa (started by current BYUH students. awesome guys). I know how much I appreciated any thoughts I could get from my 'former life', and so I'll send him a line or so when I feel like I should and I know that's been good for him.
I learned to love. I thought I knew before that-- HA. false. I did not. I probably still don't, but I know more.
I learned how to live for the small-child stampede that met me in the mornings.
I learned how to love desperately.
I learned to trust AND rely a little.
I learned to love by serving.
I learned how to fall, unstoppably, into it.
I'm learning how to verbally express it- not one of my fortes.
I learned to serve in every moment I could.
On my choir trip I learned to talk very easily with others about the Gospel, the choir, music, interests...to be truly interested.
I listen better. I care more. I may be just a bit more private, but I want to only share meaningful things and sometimes I just don't have the words, or enough time to find them.
It also happens to be my 199th post.
I was in Hamilton, New Zealand exactly 6months after the day I left Cambodia. I realized it as I was making a GoPro video, walking around the Hamilton Temple. "Hey, remember when we did this in Korea?" And I did. I remembered the exact day. December 13, 2012 (the first one).
I thought again of all the things that I had learned from that time to this.
I learned how to really fast.
It was the day that Natalie left. McKae was already getting sick and we'd forgotten that it was Fast Sunday the day before, so I fasted on Monday. Mostly for McKae because I didn't want to be left alone, I wanted her to be better. I didn't eat or drink all day, until about 7 in the evening. I was praying with part of my brain and teaching with the other part; and when Natalie offered me something to eat I almost refused because I wasn't very hungry.
I learned to be exceptionally self-driven.
I have learned how to keep better tabs on people.
I treasure my interpersonal relationships more.
I'm more aware of what lasts.
I learned to do hard things...in a different way than I had before.
The first time I cried in Cambodia was about 2 weeks after McKae had returned home. I'd made skype appointments that had all fallen through, and I was waiting for another one. I was signed in and the person on the other side of the line was late. I hadn't skyped someone on the island for about a month and it was a little nerve wracking. To distract myself from distress, I signed onto facebook and the first thing I saw was my friend Jodi's comment on a picture I'd posted, asking if there was anything I needed from the island. There wasn't, and we weren't sure of the mail security, but I was so touched and just grateful that there was still someone who knew they could do something to make sure I was okay, and they wanted to. I wasn't okay, but after seeing that I was. That was a really big thing for me.
I learned to be independent with God.
So many of the experiences in Cambodia I've seen come into play within these 6 months following that adventure. Little things where it's like "Why on earth would this be important" have been useful and have made worlds of difference.
My friend Martin is currently in the Ivory Coast working with an organization called WELL Africa (started by current BYUH students. awesome guys). I know how much I appreciated any thoughts I could get from my 'former life', and so I'll send him a line or so when I feel like I should and I know that's been good for him.
I learned to love. I thought I knew before that-- HA. false. I did not. I probably still don't, but I know more.
I learned how to live for the small-child stampede that met me in the mornings.
I learned how to love desperately.
I learned to trust AND rely a little.
I learned to love by serving.
I learned how to fall, unstoppably, into it.
I'm learning how to verbally express it- not one of my fortes.
I learned to serve in every moment I could.
On my choir trip I learned to talk very easily with others about the Gospel, the choir, music, interests...to be truly interested.
I listen better. I care more. I may be just a bit more private, but I want to only share meaningful things and sometimes I just don't have the words, or enough time to find them.
Wednesday, May 15, 2013
because he's leaving
it sounds cliche doesn't it?
Apparently I'm a hopeless romantic...somebody stop this madness. (not really, I'm quite content)
Spencer is going to CAMBODIA! And I'm so very excited BECAUSE I'm sending pictures and letters and they're going to go visit my kids!!!!! I've got to remind Megan to take a bunch of pictures. Why? Because *they're worth taking pictures of*.
Aha- mother. I've found my mental block. You complain that I no longer take pictures of my adventures. I complain that nothing more meaningful can occupy the digital space that I was once able to fill with wonders and miracles and beauty. What am I going to take pictures of- hot sauce packets asking me to marry them?
Well I'm glad I got that figured out.
Anywhoooo- I'm really excited to hear about their adventures in Cambodia and since he is going, I got to spend a lot of time the last few days putting together pictures and letters for kids that changed my life. I gave them to the man that continues to change my life. And hopefully they will both benefit...while I sit here and write a few essays.
I'm excited.
Apparently I'm a hopeless romantic...somebody stop this madness. (not really, I'm quite content)
 |
| old picture |
Aha- mother. I've found my mental block. You complain that I no longer take pictures of my adventures. I complain that nothing more meaningful can occupy the digital space that I was once able to fill with wonders and miracles and beauty. What am I going to take pictures of- hot sauce packets asking me to marry them?
Well I'm glad I got that figured out.
Anywhoooo- I'm really excited to hear about their adventures in Cambodia and since he is going, I got to spend a lot of time the last few days putting together pictures and letters for kids that changed my life. I gave them to the man that continues to change my life. And hopefully they will both benefit...while I sit here and write a few essays.
I'm excited.
Monday, January 7, 2013
to do list
I am going to tell you about all the things I missed telling you about.
Why?
Because when I am old, but still young enough that my journal is embarrassing, I want to be able to reference these things easily. Also, I promised to keep Jenni entertained.
So today, here is my blogging 'To Do List'
-the water festival that wasn't. and that thing about the moon
-What I understand of Khmer traditions
-preparing for the Cambodian Christmas Concert that I wasn't there for / Public Affairs missionaries
-Thanksgiving on a visa run to Thailand
- What it means to prepare for Christmas in a country that isn't Christian
- Service projects at cicfo
-Wat Phnom
- 10/10/10, 11/11/11, and 12/12/12
- Leaving
-my two 12/13s
- Children
- What I did when I was back in Hawaii
-The random things that I had to adjust to when I was in Hawaii, Vegas, Utah...
-being home with family
-that time the world didn't end
-Christmas
-the gathering of the girls
-great times spent in Utah after Christmas
-touchy feely post about everything that I learned because there wasn't time to bare my testimony in Church today
-New things for a new year.
That is so much. wow. I'm going to back-date these posts so that they fit into when they actually happened. They'll appear on your blogger dashboard in real time, but if you just visit the page you might miss them. To counteract that, when I post something I'll make the item(s) it checks off a hyperlink to the post so you can find it if you're interested.
Capishe?
For now, because it is late and school starts tomorrow, here are some more videos from Cambodia that you can watch. Yay videos!
Most importantly- here is a Christmas video!!!!!
Why?
Because when I am old, but still young enough that my journal is embarrassing, I want to be able to reference these things easily. Also, I promised to keep Jenni entertained.
So today, here is my blogging 'To Do List'
-the water festival that wasn't. and that thing about the moon
-What I understand of Khmer traditions
-preparing for the Cambodian Christmas Concert that I wasn't there for / Public Affairs missionaries
-Thanksgiving on a visa run to Thailand
- What it means to prepare for Christmas in a country that isn't Christian
- Service projects at cicfo
-Wat Phnom
- 10/10/10, 11/11/11, and 12/12/12
- Leaving
-my two 12/13s
- Children
- What I did when I was back in Hawaii
-The random things that I had to adjust to when I was in Hawaii, Vegas, Utah...
-being home with family
-that time the world didn't end
-Christmas
-the gathering of the girls
-great times spent in Utah after Christmas
-touchy feely post about everything that I learned because there wasn't time to bare my testimony in Church today
-New things for a new year.
That is so much. wow. I'm going to back-date these posts so that they fit into when they actually happened. They'll appear on your blogger dashboard in real time, but if you just visit the page you might miss them. To counteract that, when I post something I'll make the item(s) it checks off a hyperlink to the post so you can find it if you're interested.
Capishe?
For now, because it is late and school starts tomorrow, here are some more videos from Cambodia that you can watch. Yay videos!
Most importantly- here is a Christmas video!!!!!
Friday, December 14, 2012
Children
Today:
20 kids in Connecticut
22 kids in China
34 kids in Cambodia
Can we talk about this for a moment?
I got wonderful warm welcomes from everyone in Hawaii. I was able to go to The temple at 7am this morning to do baptisms. It was absolutely wonderful. I saw my dear friend Matt, whom I didn't expect to see. I got baptized by Greg whom I hadn't caught up with the day before. I got to eat breakfast with Liana and lament with her that her mission call wasn't there yet.
And then I went and did businessy things. I worked. I did paperwork. I went to the Health Center. All that jazz.
It was while I was at work that I first heard about the shooting in Connecticut. And we didn't really take it seriously. It didn't bring an immediately somber attitude to us because it was so out there, we couldn't fathom that ever happening.
It wasn't until we looked it up and saw footage and articles and news stories-- the media blowing up-- that it sunk in.
Did you know that, on the same day as the shooting, there was a stabbing in China? Well, technically it was the next day for them, but it happened around the same 24 hour period. Some will argue that yes, gun control worked in China. These 22 kids didn't die. 9 were taken to the hospital with sever conditions and 2 were taken to hospitals outside the country to receive better care. Some will argue that people who are going to be violent will use whatever means available to them. See, he damaged as many children with a knife as the man in Connecticut did with a gun.
And for me it was a little odd. I worked- I don't even really remember what I did. All I remember is that I went home and nobody was there. I went to my neighbor's house and there was nobody there. And so I sat down and opened this computer and started surfing facebook and blogger. I looked at more information from the shooting and the stabbing and it drug me down into the mud.
*WAIT.
I don't have to do this. Why am I doing this? This is what I've been doing for the past few months. I don't need to be on these stupid sites checking up on the lives of the people I love when I'm finally in the same general vicinity.
It is ridiculous to be on my own right now. I lived here before. I'm going to go for a walk. I haven't done that in months.*
And so I called up a friend and left a message. And then I did. I went for a walk.
I wandered around Laie for about an hour.
It was dead. Finals were basically over. The students were out of Laie celebrating, or already on their way home.
I wandered into the Haircut store and found Andrea working and she didn't get off until later.
I headed toward 'The Hawaiian House' in hopes of catching Kylie when I literally ran into her, her mom, and Lance before I'd even left the shopping center. They were on a schedule, but promised that I'd see them at Commencement the next day.
So I wandered up to The Point.
My heart hurts for the parents of Connecticut. Cambodia is a very broken country, and it is healing remarkably well, but traumas on a large scale are part of their daily lives. Newtown, CT will be a very broken city for a long time. At least I hope they will be. They need to struggle through this as a community or they will never get better. We all do. This is something that our whole nation needs to struggle with, not because we get any pleasure from tragedies but because it is okay to feel sad. It is okay to be unsure and sad and overwhelmed and angry. We need to learn how to deal with how we feel and rise above it. I never want America to get to the point where we do not mourn and drag ourselves through pits of darkness to overcome it. When we do not intensely value lives then we will find ourselves in situations like the bloodbath that was Cambodia in the late 1900s. And my heart hurts for China. There have been multiple outbursts of violence at their primary schools over the past few years. China has some of the strictest policies on gun control. For violence against the innocent to still exist is appalling but enlightening. I don't want America to get so rigid on controlling weapons that they'll drive criminals to use cruder methods. Those who choose to be violent, will be violent regardless of their tools. Those who turn their violence towards children are in dire need of very professional help. I believe that, unless you are trained to do so, killing anyone is a good indicator that you're mentally messed up. But one's brain must be all kinds of scrambled for one to be able to kill such innocence. And I know how innocent kids are. Had I not just centered my life around specific kids for months on end? I know what they are capable of. I know how easily they are influenced for good and for bad. I was in torment. I kept thinking of all the terrible life situations that my kids had gone through to get to CICFO. I dwelt on the joy that they live with because of the sadness that they have known. In my mind's eye I could see people coming into the orphanage and hurting my kids. My kids, with their smiles and their scars, and their voices and their little lips that stick out when they're confused. And the fact that America cannot adopt from Cambodia so there is no way for me to keep any of that. I didn't want to be in there in Hawaii by myself. I wanted to be back with my kids. I still do.
I didn't have very many phone numbers anymore because I'd gotten a new phone before I left. But I have friends that live up there at The Point and I hoped there would be cars in the driveway, when there were I sortof invited myself in.
I'm so grateful that I live in a place that I can just do that. I can call on a friend unexpectedly (very very unexpectedly because they didn't even know I was back) and be welcomed into their home and become part of whatever it is they are doing.
Seth and Aaron were watching Aladdin.
And then more people came over and we played games.
And we talked a little. Looking back, I wish we'd talked more, but I wasn't in much of a talkative mood. We didn't discuss the violence that plagued the earth earlier that day. We avoided the topic entirely because we don't understand it.
This post isn't going to have a happy ending. But knowing that children are received directly into the arms of our ever present Heavenly Father can make it a peaceful one.
20 kids in Connecticut
22 kids in China
34 kids in Cambodia
Can we talk about this for a moment?
I got wonderful warm welcomes from everyone in Hawaii. I was able to go to The temple at 7am this morning to do baptisms. It was absolutely wonderful. I saw my dear friend Matt, whom I didn't expect to see. I got baptized by Greg whom I hadn't caught up with the day before. I got to eat breakfast with Liana and lament with her that her mission call wasn't there yet.
And then I went and did businessy things. I worked. I did paperwork. I went to the Health Center. All that jazz.
It was while I was at work that I first heard about the shooting in Connecticut. And we didn't really take it seriously. It didn't bring an immediately somber attitude to us because it was so out there, we couldn't fathom that ever happening.It wasn't until we looked it up and saw footage and articles and news stories-- the media blowing up-- that it sunk in.
Did you know that, on the same day as the shooting, there was a stabbing in China? Well, technically it was the next day for them, but it happened around the same 24 hour period. Some will argue that yes, gun control worked in China. These 22 kids didn't die. 9 were taken to the hospital with sever conditions and 2 were taken to hospitals outside the country to receive better care. Some will argue that people who are going to be violent will use whatever means available to them. See, he damaged as many children with a knife as the man in Connecticut did with a gun.
And for me it was a little odd. I worked- I don't even really remember what I did. All I remember is that I went home and nobody was there. I went to my neighbor's house and there was nobody there. And so I sat down and opened this computer and started surfing facebook and blogger. I looked at more information from the shooting and the stabbing and it drug me down into the mud.
*WAIT.
I don't have to do this. Why am I doing this? This is what I've been doing for the past few months. I don't need to be on these stupid sites checking up on the lives of the people I love when I'm finally in the same general vicinity. It is ridiculous to be on my own right now. I lived here before. I'm going to go for a walk. I haven't done that in months.*
And so I called up a friend and left a message. And then I did. I went for a walk.
I wandered around Laie for about an hour.
It was dead. Finals were basically over. The students were out of Laie celebrating, or already on their way home.
I wandered into the Haircut store and found Andrea working and she didn't get off until later.
I headed toward 'The Hawaiian House' in hopes of catching Kylie when I literally ran into her, her mom, and Lance before I'd even left the shopping center. They were on a schedule, but promised that I'd see them at Commencement the next day.
So I wandered up to The Point.
It was around here that I received a call from the friend I'd called earlier. He had been in a final and had some responsibilities to fulfill before commencement, but he talked to me for a little bit. I promised myself, when I started my wander, that I wouldn't dwell on grief, that I wouldn't cry, and that I'd be pleasant to be around for the remainder of the evening. I broke every one of those. Here I was, wandering around, searching for familiar faces because the faces that I had expected to be surrounded with were nowhere to be found. At the time I didn't know why. I was sad and that is all I knew. I had not seen any children in 65 hours and that was something I wasn't accustomed to. Having my main human interactions come from children and then go days without seeing any is a little hard on it's own. But consider what had transpired that day.
My heart hurts for the parents of Connecticut. Cambodia is a very broken country, and it is healing remarkably well, but traumas on a large scale are part of their daily lives. Newtown, CT will be a very broken city for a long time. At least I hope they will be. They need to struggle through this as a community or they will never get better. We all do. This is something that our whole nation needs to struggle with, not because we get any pleasure from tragedies but because it is okay to feel sad. It is okay to be unsure and sad and overwhelmed and angry. We need to learn how to deal with how we feel and rise above it. I never want America to get to the point where we do not mourn and drag ourselves through pits of darkness to overcome it. When we do not intensely value lives then we will find ourselves in situations like the bloodbath that was Cambodia in the late 1900s. And my heart hurts for China. There have been multiple outbursts of violence at their primary schools over the past few years. China has some of the strictest policies on gun control. For violence against the innocent to still exist is appalling but enlightening. I don't want America to get so rigid on controlling weapons that they'll drive criminals to use cruder methods. Those who choose to be violent, will be violent regardless of their tools. Those who turn their violence towards children are in dire need of very professional help. I believe that, unless you are trained to do so, killing anyone is a good indicator that you're mentally messed up. But one's brain must be all kinds of scrambled for one to be able to kill such innocence. And I know how innocent kids are. Had I not just centered my life around specific kids for months on end? I know what they are capable of. I know how easily they are influenced for good and for bad. I was in torment. I kept thinking of all the terrible life situations that my kids had gone through to get to CICFO. I dwelt on the joy that they live with because of the sadness that they have known. In my mind's eye I could see people coming into the orphanage and hurting my kids. My kids, with their smiles and their scars, and their voices and their little lips that stick out when they're confused. And the fact that America cannot adopt from Cambodia so there is no way for me to keep any of that. I didn't want to be in there in Hawaii by myself. I wanted to be back with my kids. I still do.
I didn't have very many phone numbers anymore because I'd gotten a new phone before I left. But I have friends that live up there at The Point and I hoped there would be cars in the driveway, when there were I sortof invited myself in.
I'm so grateful that I live in a place that I can just do that. I can call on a friend unexpectedly (very very unexpectedly because they didn't even know I was back) and be welcomed into their home and become part of whatever it is they are doing.
Seth and Aaron were watching Aladdin.
And then more people came over and we played games.
And we talked a little. Looking back, I wish we'd talked more, but I wasn't in much of a talkative mood. We didn't discuss the violence that plagued the earth earlier that day. We avoided the topic entirely because we don't understand it.
This post isn't going to have a happy ending. But knowing that children are received directly into the arms of our ever present Heavenly Father can make it a peaceful one.
Wednesday, December 12, 2012
leaving on a jet plane
I can't tell you how many times I looked at the room.
I swept. I organized organized children's books. I wrote everything I could down in the little book that I'd decided to keep notes in. I washed all the sheets. I selected the clothes that I would leave for whomever wanted them.
I looked around- was it done? Did I have absolutely everything I needed? Did I leave anything that I'd regret? Did I clean all the mirrors? Are the international plugs in an accessible location?
I don't know very many songs on the Uke, and even less on the guitar, but I got the idea to learn "Leaving on a Jetplane" after I saw a friend sing it to this girl who was decided to go on a mission.
And my bags were weighed. In kilos and in pounds. And I'd taken them down the steep steps. And I was waiting for the girls to come home. I was stuck in the front room, just waiting. I think that was the worst part. I wanted so badly just to be at CICFO and spent the last couple hours with the kids, but I couldn't leave and then they'd have to bring my bike back, and they wouldn't know where I was. Well, I suppose they would, but they'd have to bring me back to get my luggage in that traffic and that that's no fun. So I sat and journal-ed.
And the song played in my head (now would be a good time to pull it up on YouTube).
And I was standing by the glass doors.
And I had taken pictures and videos of the house so I'd remember it....like I could forget....but you never know.
And I thought back to earlier that day when I'd been at CICFO. Some of the kids were going to Choir practice and so they didn't think they'd get to see me on my way to the airport. And as I left, or they left, they said "Goodbye Sister, I love you." and I said "I love you too, I'll see you tomorrow." without really even thinking about it.
No Aria, no you're not.
You may not even see them 'later'.
You may not see them until you see them in heaven, even if you do come back to visit.
And of course, I can't visit until I'm married. Or have a kid. That was the last one I heard. "You have to come back when you have baby."
It's a safety thing as well as a culture thing (the husband not the baby-- I'm not sure about the baby comment).
Sunny and Yaya came back from some wedding festivities and went to change. Botevy came down to say goodbye, but that was as far as she got since she was still recovering from her surgery. I hated to wake her up, if I had known she was awake I would have gone up to say my goodbyes instead of having her take the steps.
It was so late when I got there. And the kids had school the next day. So many of them were asleep. But we sang and prayed and hugged and played-- and took a few pictures.
There are so many things that could have gone better. There are ways that I could have been more effective or efficient. There are things that, if I could go back, I would have just asked about beforehand. There are times when they let me down and I let them down. There were moments when I was frustrated and drowning just a little bit, because I'm human. There are concepts that they didn't get and mistakes that I didn't get to fix all the way. And they mean everything.
They sang the primary songs that they'd sung when I very first met them.
I sang "Aloha Oe", because I'm from Hawaii and I knew we were all going to sing 'God Be With You Til We Meet Again' together once I was done.
And we did hugs again. And Phanith showed me the Nativity drawing that he'd finished. And Chakrya gave me a letter.
And we piled in the car. And part of me didn't want them to come. I didn't want them to watch me leave. I felt bad that not everyone could go with us. And the rest of me was so glad they were there.
The airport is rather close.
There is a large open area right outside the check-in lines. Only people who have a plane to catch are allowed in, and they take one person with them to push bags. The rest of your party-- and everyone has a party-- waits outside and watches you to through the line.
The line takes forever. It almost always does. But when you're through and your luggage is stowed, you go back outside and say goodbye again. I know this because we did the same for Natalie and then McKae, and I saw so many people do the same.
And then you walk in, and you wave through the glass doors, and they watch you go up the escalator.
And then you get the last look.
And then you can't see them anymore.
I don't know if or when I'll be back again.
Oh, babe, I hate to go.
I swept. I organized organized children's books. I wrote everything I could down in the little book that I'd decided to keep notes in. I washed all the sheets. I selected the clothes that I would leave for whomever wanted them.
I looked around- was it done? Did I have absolutely everything I needed? Did I leave anything that I'd regret? Did I clean all the mirrors? Are the international plugs in an accessible location?
I don't know very many songs on the Uke, and even less on the guitar, but I got the idea to learn "Leaving on a Jetplane" after I saw a friend sing it to this girl who was decided to go on a mission.
And my bags were weighed. In kilos and in pounds. And I'd taken them down the steep steps. And I was waiting for the girls to come home. I was stuck in the front room, just waiting. I think that was the worst part. I wanted so badly just to be at CICFO and spent the last couple hours with the kids, but I couldn't leave and then they'd have to bring my bike back, and they wouldn't know where I was. Well, I suppose they would, but they'd have to bring me back to get my luggage in that traffic and that that's no fun. So I sat and journal-ed.
And the song played in my head (now would be a good time to pull it up on YouTube).
And I was standing by the glass doors.
And I had taken pictures and videos of the house so I'd remember it....like I could forget....but you never know.
And I thought back to earlier that day when I'd been at CICFO. Some of the kids were going to Choir practice and so they didn't think they'd get to see me on my way to the airport. And as I left, or they left, they said "Goodbye Sister, I love you." and I said "I love you too, I'll see you tomorrow." without really even thinking about it.
No Aria, no you're not.
You may not even see them 'later'.
You may not see them until you see them in heaven, even if you do come back to visit.
And of course, I can't visit until I'm married. Or have a kid. That was the last one I heard. "You have to come back when you have baby."
It's a safety thing as well as a culture thing (the husband not the baby-- I'm not sure about the baby comment).
There are so many things that could have gone better. There are ways that I could have been more effective or efficient. There are things that, if I could go back, I would have just asked about beforehand. There are times when they let me down and I let them down. There were moments when I was frustrated and drowning just a little bit, because I'm human. There are concepts that they didn't get and mistakes that I didn't get to fix all the way. And they mean everything.
They sang the primary songs that they'd sung when I very first met them.
I sang "Aloha Oe", because I'm from Hawaii and I knew we were all going to sing 'God Be With You Til We Meet Again' together once I was done.
And we did hugs again. And Phanith showed me the Nativity drawing that he'd finished. And Chakrya gave me a letter.
And we piled in the car. And part of me didn't want them to come. I didn't want them to watch me leave. I felt bad that not everyone could go with us. And the rest of me was so glad they were there.
The airport is rather close.
There is a large open area right outside the check-in lines. Only people who have a plane to catch are allowed in, and they take one person with them to push bags. The rest of your party-- and everyone has a party-- waits outside and watches you to through the line.
The line takes forever. It almost always does. But when you're through and your luggage is stowed, you go back outside and say goodbye again. I know this because we did the same for Natalie and then McKae, and I saw so many people do the same.
And then you walk in, and you wave through the glass doors, and they watch you go up the escalator.
And then you get the last look.
And then you can't see them anymore.
Oh, babe, I hate to go.
the last of the epic dates
I stayed up entirely too late on 12/11/12...or 11/12/12 depending on how you write it...I was packing, I was writing, I was fixing problems for my professor. Ridiculous.
But I literally SAW 12/12/12 12:12:12am. How cool is that? Freakin awesome that's what it is. And so began the last awesome repetitive date until 01/01/01, in 89 years.
I didn't sleep until around 3. I was trying so hard to get everything absolutely ready for me to leave. Oh- amidst the awesome things that I did that day, I left Cambodia. Yeah. Not particularly my favorite thing ever, but it had to happen. But that wasn't until late at night.
I woke up to wash my sheets and such at 6:30am. But the power was out. That's alright. It gave me time to get ready for...
A traditional Khmer wedding.
It was Vanneth's niece's wedding I think.
I remember going to the Cambodia cultural village thing waaay early in the game and seeing a presentation of a wedding. Well, this was a real one.
There were a lot of weddings going on. It didn't really dawn on me until later. 12/12/12- of course there are tons of weddings. Having previously been adjacent to a Khmer wedding (set up right outside my house for a few days) I can tell which big tents are weddings. They're the ones decorated in Pink and Yellow.
People get married in their houses. In the front room actually. They have the food/party tent in the street right outside their house. The tent always has fruit at the entrance. Fruit from trees. In this case there were legit Banana branches outside. But I've seen coconuts used as well. The branch on one side is painted gold, the other silver.
Before the wedding starts there is a presentation of the dowry from the groom and his parents to the bride's parents. What happened here is all the guests were given plates of food and send about a block down the road to wait until they could approach. Basically we waited until the film crew (that's right) and the music was ready. There was 2 of each type of food and you stood in 2 lines, partnered with your matching food item. I had pomegranates, so I stood next to Sunny because she did too.
We approached the house, handed the food to the groom's parents in turn, and they set it down before the parents of the bride.
There is lots of bowing going on here.
I think during the food giving thing, the Groom is either there or he comes out during it. But the bride isn't there yet.
So after we walked our little thing, we went into the big tent where they fed us food. I had an entire dragonfruit- man I'm gonna miss that. When we were done we went and watched the 'exciting part of the rituals'.
Khmer weddings are very loud. Everything and everyone is using a microphone. The priest guy, saying his thing, the little instrument group, the singers- everyone.
I asked Pattica why, and he said it was because they wanted all of the ancestors to be able to hear about the wedding.
So they do these ritual things. They open silver boxes....it's all very small ritual stuff. Hard to follow.
You know what I did notice? The groom was smiling THE WHOLE TIME. He was super excited and you could tell.
The bride DID. NOT. It was like her face was set in a mask. I asked Pattica why she wasn't smiling. He said that you're not supposed to smile during your wedding or else people will think that you planned it on your own. (That's taboo) When I pointed out that the groom was smiling he said 'Oh, well of course he is happy, he gets a wife!'
I don't get it.
So she is there, miss stone face, and she didn't crack a smile until he finished putting the ring on her finger. And I caught it on camera.
So then the couple goes and changes into a different outfit. And the singer/comedians entertain you while you sit and wait. Then they come out and do the traditional cutting of the hair with these special gold scissors. Traditionally, girls would not have their hair cut until their wedding and then they'd cut it in order to get rid of all the past bad luck. They don't actually cut their hair now, they just pantomime it.
There is lots of Asean music (yes, I spelled it right. Indochina goes by 'Asean' as well as 'Asian') and more laughing and poking fun at marriage by the singing/laughing couple. Then we left. There are more rituals and then a whole lot of dancing, for at least a day. They give you lucky money in red envelopes as you come and go. But that was all for me. We needed to head back and I could get some paperwork for Botevy and go visit CICFO for the last time. And there you have it.
I rung in 10/10/10 finishing up with the very first Haunted Lagoon at the PCC.
I spent 11/11/11 at an Aborigine seminar.
I was in Cambodia and spent 12/12/12 at a traditional wedding.
It is a good thing there is no 13/13/13 because I'd have to go to the moon to top this.
But I literally SAW 12/12/12 12:12:12am. How cool is that? Freakin awesome that's what it is. And so began the last awesome repetitive date until 01/01/01, in 89 years.
I didn't sleep until around 3. I was trying so hard to get everything absolutely ready for me to leave. Oh- amidst the awesome things that I did that day, I left Cambodia. Yeah. Not particularly my favorite thing ever, but it had to happen. But that wasn't until late at night.
I woke up to wash my sheets and such at 6:30am. But the power was out. That's alright. It gave me time to get ready for...
A traditional Khmer wedding.
It was Vanneth's niece's wedding I think.
I remember going to the Cambodia cultural village thing waaay early in the game and seeing a presentation of a wedding. Well, this was a real one.
There were a lot of weddings going on. It didn't really dawn on me until later. 12/12/12- of course there are tons of weddings. Having previously been adjacent to a Khmer wedding (set up right outside my house for a few days) I can tell which big tents are weddings. They're the ones decorated in Pink and Yellow.People get married in their houses. In the front room actually. They have the food/party tent in the street right outside their house. The tent always has fruit at the entrance. Fruit from trees. In this case there were legit Banana branches outside. But I've seen coconuts used as well. The branch on one side is painted gold, the other silver.
Before the wedding starts there is a presentation of the dowry from the groom and his parents to the bride's parents. What happened here is all the guests were given plates of food and send about a block down the road to wait until they could approach. Basically we waited until the film crew (that's right) and the music was ready. There was 2 of each type of food and you stood in 2 lines, partnered with your matching food item. I had pomegranates, so I stood next to Sunny because she did too.
We approached the house, handed the food to the groom's parents in turn, and they set it down before the parents of the bride.There is lots of bowing going on here.
I think during the food giving thing, the Groom is either there or he comes out during it. But the bride isn't there yet.
So after we walked our little thing, we went into the big tent where they fed us food. I had an entire dragonfruit- man I'm gonna miss that. When we were done we went and watched the 'exciting part of the rituals'.
Khmer weddings are very loud. Everything and everyone is using a microphone. The priest guy, saying his thing, the little instrument group, the singers- everyone.
I asked Pattica why, and he said it was because they wanted all of the ancestors to be able to hear about the wedding.
So they do these ritual things. They open silver boxes....it's all very small ritual stuff. Hard to follow.
You know what I did notice? The groom was smiling THE WHOLE TIME. He was super excited and you could tell.
The bride DID. NOT. It was like her face was set in a mask. I asked Pattica why she wasn't smiling. He said that you're not supposed to smile during your wedding or else people will think that you planned it on your own. (That's taboo) When I pointed out that the groom was smiling he said 'Oh, well of course he is happy, he gets a wife!'
I don't get it.
So she is there, miss stone face, and she didn't crack a smile until he finished putting the ring on her finger. And I caught it on camera.
There is lots of Asean music (yes, I spelled it right. Indochina goes by 'Asean' as well as 'Asian') and more laughing and poking fun at marriage by the singing/laughing couple. Then we left. There are more rituals and then a whole lot of dancing, for at least a day. They give you lucky money in red envelopes as you come and go. But that was all for me. We needed to head back and I could get some paperwork for Botevy and go visit CICFO for the last time. And there you have it.
I rung in 10/10/10 finishing up with the very first Haunted Lagoon at the PCC.
I spent 11/11/11 at an Aborigine seminar.
I was in Cambodia and spent 12/12/12 at a traditional wedding.
It is a good thing there is no 13/13/13 because I'd have to go to the moon to top this.
Tuesday, December 11, 2012
Wat Phnom
Yaya decided to take me to see some sites around the city before I left. But we had a time limit because she had night classes at 5:30. So we did last minute souvenir shopping and looked at the river and then we went to see Wat Phnom.
Wat Phnom- Phnom is the city...duh. Wat means temple. ANGKOR Wat. Wat PHNOM....there are other WATs... yup.
A long time ago, when I had the kids describe things to me in a presentation, Pattica did his on Wat Phnom. So I knew a little bit about it, which was fun. Wat Phnom is a Buddhist temple. So there are Buddhists priests around. It cost me $1 to get in because I'm not Khmer. It was really cool to see the decorations and compare them to the ones that you see in Angkor. Those ones, since they're ruins, are very dilapidated. A lot of the faces of the dragon balustrades have been stolen by bad people. I remember when I was in Angkor, wondering what they looked like. Now I know. The design wasn't lost, it just wasn't there. Since this is a temple, there are sacrifices. Not in the killing things way, but they buy birds and feed them and set them free, or keep them in the cage and give them to the priests. I suppose it depends on the type of blessings you want. But there was this cute little girls sitting selling birds so I took a picture. There are lots of Apsara designs here as well. One of my favorite Khmer designs.
At the back of Wat Phnom there is this big clock on the grass and right above it, on the top of the hill, there is this statue. I couldn't get it all in one picture, so I took a few and then photoshopped them together.
And then we get to a funny story.
So Buddhist monks are like regular monks. They aren't allowed to get married, they aren't allowed to work for monetary compensation, all that jazz. But they do have cellphones and stuff like that. We were on the top of the building taking pictures when this monk comes up to us. We ask him to take a picture for us and then he insists that Yaya take a picture with him. He handed me his phone and I took a picture on it, and then he had me take one on my camera. Yeah. Weird. Apparently he asked Yaya for her phone number and was trying to get her to spend time with him.
Well we walked around trying to find monkeys or elephants and didn't find any, so we went back to the store and I bought ice cream to take to the kids. That was a fun night. We just sat and ate ice cream and sang together. I sang to them, they sang to me, we sang together. Lovely.
Sunday, December 9, 2012
So this is Christmas
I was listening to Christmas music with McKae weeks before she left.
That was in October.
I started a Christmas playlist on YouTube and listened to it all the time.
While we slept.
While we planned for class.
While we worked.
While we waited for movies to load.
Especially while we drank Milo. Yup. Milo. It's pretty good. Like hot chocolate, but better.
And I lived in Hawaii for 2 Christmas seasons, so I'm used to the "it's-not-getting-cold" Christmas spirit. You all put on jackets, and I wear a Christmas hat at the beach to make you all jealous.
Yea, I know it worked.
Well, it was just as hot- hotter- in Cambodia. But it was a lot harder to prepare for Christmas.
Mom would tell me ever time we skyped: "You should get something special from Cambodia that will mean something and be really fun, like a Nativity!"
They don't have Nativities here.
"We went to Opportunity Village and they had a traditional Vietnamese Nativity."
Here is the thing. Vietnam- don't ask me why, I don't know- accepted Christianity as a nation a very looooong time ago. I'm not saying the whole country is Christian, because it's not, but there is a large percentage and there are families that have been Christian for generations.
Cambodia is 3% Christian.
3%
That's all.
As opposed to the US where about 78% of the country is some type of Christian.
The Christmas they get is commercial. The mall and the department stores started putting up Santa hats and Christmas trees and ornaments in window paint as it got closer to the end of December.
I was closer than I've ever been to the area where Christ was born. I was there during the time we celebrate it. But there is no culture of Christmas music. It's like the rest of Bethlehem who were ignorant of His birth. They just went on, not knowing what Christ was or why.
A basic belief of Cambodia is that your life is determined by your past life. If you're poor it's because your spirit is bad, or you're being punished. It's hard for us to think that way because we know that isn't true.
Industry takes on so many more road blocks here because someone with an idea isn't naturally imbued with the idea that he can rise above his circumstances. That idea is changing, but it's still there. And yes, it still exists even though there are people who fight to live every day. They struggle, they live on the dumps and collect recyclables to sell so that they can eat that night, they live on abandoned train tracks. So many know that reading would change their situation, but without the money to even eat, how would they get the money to go to school?
I think that's a huge struggle for Christianity as well. Christians are readers. We got our Bibles and our Book of Mormons and our Christian literature, there is a whole genre for Christian writers.
Some missionaries teach people to read as they're trying to bring people to Christ. And that is hard. How do you convert someone who can't read? You convert the ones who do and that still leaves the poorest. Thus- 3%.
But my kids do read.
And we made a nativity. And we sang Christmas songs. And they know Christmas songs- real ones about Christ- in Khmer and in English.
And I taught them the Christmas story. We read about it. And we talked about it. And we did activities surrounding it.
And it's hard. It really is. Christmas is such a simple thing, but only by surrounding myself by it was I able to find the feeling I wanted.
I saw Christmas lights outside a restaurant on my way to the Orphanage near evening one day. But Christmas lights weren't there to signify the spirit of Christmas. They were there to draw attention to the place. It was special, but not for the right reasons. It was apparent by the girls waiting by the door of the establishment that it was a marketing stunt.
Ooooo evil is so clever. And always has been.
And so this is Christmas, and what have you done to remember the Savior.
John Lennon? or Celtic Women?
The struggle to create Christmas within yourself begins there.
It's proof that you can have Santa and sleigh-bells, trees and wrapping paper, cocoa and nutcrackers without the spirit of love that we associate with Christmas.
That was in October.
I started a Christmas playlist on YouTube and listened to it all the time.
While we slept.
While we planned for class.
While we worked.
While we waited for movies to load.
Especially while we drank Milo. Yup. Milo. It's pretty good. Like hot chocolate, but better.
And I lived in Hawaii for 2 Christmas seasons, so I'm used to the "it's-not-getting-cold" Christmas spirit. You all put on jackets, and I wear a Christmas hat at the beach to make you all jealous.
Yea, I know it worked.
Well, it was just as hot- hotter- in Cambodia. But it was a lot harder to prepare for Christmas.
Mom would tell me ever time we skyped: "You should get something special from Cambodia that will mean something and be really fun, like a Nativity!"
They don't have Nativities here.
"We went to Opportunity Village and they had a traditional Vietnamese Nativity."
Here is the thing. Vietnam- don't ask me why, I don't know- accepted Christianity as a nation a very looooong time ago. I'm not saying the whole country is Christian, because it's not, but there is a large percentage and there are families that have been Christian for generations.
Cambodia is 3% Christian.
3%
That's all.
As opposed to the US where about 78% of the country is some type of Christian.
The Christmas they get is commercial. The mall and the department stores started putting up Santa hats and Christmas trees and ornaments in window paint as it got closer to the end of December.
 |
| We made snowflakes too. But we sang Christmas songs while we did it. |
I was closer than I've ever been to the area where Christ was born. I was there during the time we celebrate it. But there is no culture of Christmas music. It's like the rest of Bethlehem who were ignorant of His birth. They just went on, not knowing what Christ was or why.
A basic belief of Cambodia is that your life is determined by your past life. If you're poor it's because your spirit is bad, or you're being punished. It's hard for us to think that way because we know that isn't true.
Industry takes on so many more road blocks here because someone with an idea isn't naturally imbued with the idea that he can rise above his circumstances. That idea is changing, but it's still there. And yes, it still exists even though there are people who fight to live every day. They struggle, they live on the dumps and collect recyclables to sell so that they can eat that night, they live on abandoned train tracks. So many know that reading would change their situation, but without the money to even eat, how would they get the money to go to school?
I think that's a huge struggle for Christianity as well. Christians are readers. We got our Bibles and our Book of Mormons and our Christian literature, there is a whole genre for Christian writers.
Some missionaries teach people to read as they're trying to bring people to Christ. And that is hard. How do you convert someone who can't read? You convert the ones who do and that still leaves the poorest. Thus- 3%.
But my kids do read.
And we made a nativity. And we sang Christmas songs. And they know Christmas songs- real ones about Christ- in Khmer and in English.
And I taught them the Christmas story. We read about it. And we talked about it. And we did activities surrounding it.
And it's hard. It really is. Christmas is such a simple thing, but only by surrounding myself by it was I able to find the feeling I wanted.
I saw Christmas lights outside a restaurant on my way to the Orphanage near evening one day. But Christmas lights weren't there to signify the spirit of Christmas. They were there to draw attention to the place. It was special, but not for the right reasons. It was apparent by the girls waiting by the door of the establishment that it was a marketing stunt.
Ooooo evil is so clever. And always has been.
And so this is Christmas, and what have you done to remember the Savior.
John Lennon? or Celtic Women?
The struggle to create Christmas within yourself begins there.
It's proof that you can have Santa and sleigh-bells, trees and wrapping paper, cocoa and nutcrackers without the spirit of love that we associate with Christmas.
Saturday, December 8, 2012
the Vietnamese branch
I had no idea bout the service project until Sister James, one of the senior missionaries, mentioned it to me at choir rehearsal 2 days before.
And that was lucky. Botevy was coming home from the hospital that day.
I made sure Yaya knew about it. I talked to her about what we wanted the volunteers to do.
Nobody was really sure.
Oh, we'll have them move this.
Oh, maybe they can paint that.
Well it's a Saturday afternoon. 1pm, right when it gets hot.
I'm there, waiting. Ready to help out and direct people as I know we'll need.
I had no idea who was coming. All I heard was that it was missionaries.
They were the Vietnamese speaking missionaries. Along with the YSA of the Vietnamese branch.
They got lost on the way a little bit, figured it out.
I got along right off with a Sister from Michigan. She's a red-head. Love it.
You know. Vietnam is really close to Cambodia.
Look at Thai: สวัสดี
And then look at Khmer: ជំážšាបសួážš
Just at a glance, you'd think they have the same alphabet and that they can read eachother's language. Kinda how you can read Spanish if you can read this.
That's not how it is. (both of those say 'Hello'. Thai is 'Saawatdee' and Khmer is 'Jiom riab sur')
Well, Vietnamese uses the Roman alphabet!!!! (if you can read this, so do you)
But when missionaries get to Vietnam, they get Vietnamese names. Cool? Ch-yea.
Anyway, we had them clear out the weeds and grass and garbage out of half of the area where...really nothing much happens. Chickens roam. Laundry is hung. Kids play. There are plots of groomed gardens in the area but they're taken care of. (so I guess a lot happens there- but it's like your living room, it serves whatever purpose it needs)
Some of the members were a little sad that the kids weren't there. Most of them were at school. All of the little ones were at school for at least part of the time. A couple were done before the project was over, but for the most part they didn't get to play with kids very much. Unfortunate. We love to play.
Resae tried to make a basket with the little rubber ball...and then ended up kicking it around until it got into some muck. When we were all done...or had worked long enough...we stood in a circle and sang I am a Child of God.
And that was lucky. Botevy was coming home from the hospital that day.
I made sure Yaya knew about it. I talked to her about what we wanted the volunteers to do.
Nobody was really sure.
Oh, we'll have them move this.
Oh, maybe they can paint that.
Well it's a Saturday afternoon. 1pm, right when it gets hot.
I'm there, waiting. Ready to help out and direct people as I know we'll need.
I had no idea who was coming. All I heard was that it was missionaries.
They were the Vietnamese speaking missionaries. Along with the YSA of the Vietnamese branch.
They got lost on the way a little bit, figured it out.
I got along right off with a Sister from Michigan. She's a red-head. Love it.
You know. Vietnam is really close to Cambodia.
Look at Thai: สวัสดี
And then look at Khmer: ជំážšាបសួážš
Just at a glance, you'd think they have the same alphabet and that they can read eachother's language. Kinda how you can read Spanish if you can read this.
That's not how it is. (both of those say 'Hello'. Thai is 'Saawatdee' and Khmer is 'Jiom riab sur')
Well, Vietnamese uses the Roman alphabet!!!! (if you can read this, so do you)
But when missionaries get to Vietnam, they get Vietnamese names. Cool? Ch-yea.
Anyway, we had them clear out the weeds and grass and garbage out of half of the area where...really nothing much happens. Chickens roam. Laundry is hung. Kids play. There are plots of groomed gardens in the area but they're taken care of. (so I guess a lot happens there- but it's like your living room, it serves whatever purpose it needs)
Some of the members were a little sad that the kids weren't there. Most of them were at school. All of the little ones were at school for at least part of the time. A couple were done before the project was over, but for the most part they didn't get to play with kids very much. Unfortunate. We love to play.
Resae tried to make a basket with the little rubber ball...and then ended up kicking it around until it got into some muck. When we were all done...or had worked long enough...we stood in a circle and sang I am a Child of God.
The Christmas Concert
I met Elder and Sister James at the orphanage. They had come to teach the kids 'Christmas Bells'. Botevy told me to go and help them, so I went over to the orphanage on Wednesday night. It was always Wednesday.
They were supposed to come at 6. But they didn't. So the kids and I started singing. I brought my pennywhistle and so we were playing around a little. Theary wanted me to sing 'My Heart Will Go On'. I decided to put the words on the board and then they could sing and I'd be able to play.
The markers were running dry and the power went out soon after that. But the Missionaries where there then.
It set the stage for the rest of their visits. The power seemed to always go out right before they came.
I always had my uke with me, and I know just enough to play some sort of accompaniment.
The first time we just learned the words. We all stood together and sang under the battery powered light.
The next week they came late again because traffic was bad. But they brought their pipe chimes.
The Khmer don't keep time very well. American hymn-styles are very different than Khmer music. Their own music they do very well, but ours they have a really hard time with. It's strange.
We worked the second week for about half an hour before the James' got there. It was right before Thanksgiving, so they brought their son and daughter in law who were visiting with them. They brought us icecream and a suitcase full of paper and pens. They sang with us and then left.
The third time was the first where we actually had power, so Sister James brought out her keyboard. Her FUNCTIONAL keyboard. We got to sing with the piano and the chimes and everybody knew the words. It was great.
After the 2nd week, Elder and Sister James started taking some of the older kids to the Church for the combined choir practice. The boys would ride their bikes, but the girls rode in the car. I went with them about 2 weeks before I left and then just kept going.
Elder and Sister James are Public Affairs missionaries. There is 1 couple assigned to countries where the Church isn't very big. They meet important people and just make friends with people of influence to give the Church a good rep.
Sister James seems to be a classically trained singer. It's so funny to watch her conduct the Khmer group. She beats each beat with so much force, trying to hold them to the beat. It's quite a feat, what they're doing. The Church in Cambodia has never done a Christmas Concert before. Everyone was excited. They brought in costumes so they could do a little live nativity presentation. All the members around Phnom Penh were involved. There was the Vietnamese Branch, the branch in the suburbs, the international branch, all the missionaries. Most of the music was sung in English at least in part. I found that to be true in singing with the kids. They know songs in Khmer, but they love singing the ones they know in English.
They sang Jingle Bells. I helped pass out little ribbons with bells on them for rehearsal. Everyone gets all excited and tries so hard to keep their bells from ringing when it's not time.
Botevy had Panith, one of the boys, draw a Nativity scene. All of the kids were to sign it and they were supposed to put it on the wall for people to see as they came into the chapel for the concert. After Panith made his drawing, we worked on a little Nativity of our own to put somewhere in CICFO.
The Church was all decorated with lights. Mission President Moon wasn't super happy about that, but everyone was really proud of it, so it stayed. They wound red ribbon up the stair rails. There were trees outside strung with lights. There was a Santa cut-out on the door.
The concert was on the 15th, so I wasn't able to go, but it was really fun to watch as a bunch of the members came together, and all of the senior missionary couples worked to make it a success.
They were supposed to come at 6. But they didn't. So the kids and I started singing. I brought my pennywhistle and so we were playing around a little. Theary wanted me to sing 'My Heart Will Go On'. I decided to put the words on the board and then they could sing and I'd be able to play.
The markers were running dry and the power went out soon after that. But the Missionaries where there then.
It set the stage for the rest of their visits. The power seemed to always go out right before they came.
I always had my uke with me, and I know just enough to play some sort of accompaniment.
The first time we just learned the words. We all stood together and sang under the battery powered light.
The Khmer don't keep time very well. American hymn-styles are very different than Khmer music. Their own music they do very well, but ours they have a really hard time with. It's strange.
We worked the second week for about half an hour before the James' got there. It was right before Thanksgiving, so they brought their son and daughter in law who were visiting with them. They brought us icecream and a suitcase full of paper and pens. They sang with us and then left.
The third time was the first where we actually had power, so Sister James brought out her keyboard. Her FUNCTIONAL keyboard. We got to sing with the piano and the chimes and everybody knew the words. It was great.
After the 2nd week, Elder and Sister James started taking some of the older kids to the Church for the combined choir practice. The boys would ride their bikes, but the girls rode in the car. I went with them about 2 weeks before I left and then just kept going.
Elder and Sister James are Public Affairs missionaries. There is 1 couple assigned to countries where the Church isn't very big. They meet important people and just make friends with people of influence to give the Church a good rep.
Sister James seems to be a classically trained singer. It's so funny to watch her conduct the Khmer group. She beats each beat with so much force, trying to hold them to the beat. It's quite a feat, what they're doing. The Church in Cambodia has never done a Christmas Concert before. Everyone was excited. They brought in costumes so they could do a little live nativity presentation. All the members around Phnom Penh were involved. There was the Vietnamese Branch, the branch in the suburbs, the international branch, all the missionaries. Most of the music was sung in English at least in part. I found that to be true in singing with the kids. They know songs in Khmer, but they love singing the ones they know in English.
They sang Jingle Bells. I helped pass out little ribbons with bells on them for rehearsal. Everyone gets all excited and tries so hard to keep their bells from ringing when it's not time.
The Church was all decorated with lights. Mission President Moon wasn't super happy about that, but everyone was really proud of it, so it stayed. They wound red ribbon up the stair rails. There were trees outside strung with lights. There was a Santa cut-out on the door.
The concert was on the 15th, so I wasn't able to go, but it was really fun to watch as a bunch of the members came together, and all of the senior missionary couples worked to make it a success.
Wednesday, December 5, 2012
small flip-out
Just a small one.
It is 90degrees F today in Phom Penh.
And I log onto facebook....
I really need to stay off of it. Seriously. Facebook is a timesucker.
But there isn't a more reliable way of contacting people to coordinate rides/storage/paperwork/ yada yada.
At this point it can't be helped.
Back to the story- I log onto facebook and my friend posts a picture.
"First big snow!"
Where is she? Oh, she's in Korea.
<inhaling groan>
Where am I going to be next week?
In Korea. I'm meeting a friend for brunch during my layover.
Story about that. These are the people that I bought Rage from (Rage is our car). We bought it the day before they left the island and then they went and got married and moved to Korea. As we parted they were like, if you're ever in Korea...
And Abby and I were like, yeah- IF- that'd be totally cool.
But inside we're like, yeah that's not gonna happen.
But it's happening. If you'd told me when I bought the car that I'd see this couple 6mos later in Korea, I would have given you a 'you keep thinking that honey' smile and disregarded it completely.
Monique told me to wear the warmest clothes I had because it will be cold.
And then I saw this picture.
And then I checked the weather forecast.
<GASP> It's going to be between 28-47 degrees F on the day I'm there.
<inner turmoil>
I am not prepared for that. Not at all.
It's against the law to take the airplane blankets off of the flight.
<melodramatic> I'm going to die.
It is 90degrees F today in Phom Penh.
And I log onto facebook....
I really need to stay off of it. Seriously. Facebook is a timesucker.
But there isn't a more reliable way of contacting people to coordinate rides/storage/paperwork/ yada yada.
At this point it can't be helped.
Back to the story- I log onto facebook and my friend posts a picture.
"First big snow!"
Where is she? Oh, she's in Korea.
<inhaling groan>
Where am I going to be next week?
In Korea. I'm meeting a friend for brunch during my layover.
Story about that. These are the people that I bought Rage from (Rage is our car). We bought it the day before they left the island and then they went and got married and moved to Korea. As we parted they were like, if you're ever in Korea...
And Abby and I were like, yeah- IF- that'd be totally cool.
But inside we're like, yeah that's not gonna happen.
But it's happening. If you'd told me when I bought the car that I'd see this couple 6mos later in Korea, I would have given you a 'you keep thinking that honey' smile and disregarded it completely.
Monique told me to wear the warmest clothes I had because it will be cold.
And then I saw this picture.
And then I checked the weather forecast.
<GASP> It's going to be between 28-47 degrees F on the day I'm there.
<inner turmoil>
I am not prepared for that. Not at all.
It's against the law to take the airplane blankets off of the flight.
<melodramatic> I'm going to die.
Thursday, November 29, 2012
musings of the silent
I lost my voice in time for the Water Festival (more on that later). Teaching while you're not talking is difficult- until you decide to bring Disney movies. Then you're fine. Today my voice is back-ish.
I posted on the ICHope Blog about our struggle to create here in cicfo. It's a battle- BUT today Channy came into class and sat down in the desk right in front of me.
"Sister, I write. Once upon a time there was a girl named Sarong and she like to play with the dog."
So we finished our re-telling of Goldilocks and the Three Bears and encouraged them to write me stories like that; stories about each other. Channy and Sarong are really good at it. They had lots of fun. They were able to guess (with exaggerated pronunciation by yours truly) most of the spelling on the words they didn't know, they made jokes that went completely over my head, but I laughed anyway-- got some of it on video for our video montages (which are coming). SreyMey and Monthy are not good at it. They get discouraged and don't really know what to do, they keep asking me what to write. So once Sarong and Channy were done with theirs, I had them pair up with the other two and help them write.
I cannot adequately express how huge this is. I haven't been able to get the little kids writing more than 1 original sentence. They've been holding out on me.
Every 15 minutes my computer screen changes pictures. I have pictures of family, pictures of friends from home, pictures of friends from Hawaii, pictures of the beach, you know normal stuff.
I'd rather not see some of these pictures because a) I can't see them b) I can't be there c) I know I'm missing out on their lives etc etc.
Some of them are fine, like the ones that I've got from when I/we were really little at family reunions.
Some of them, like the ones of my friends that are graduating/going on missions/leaving/having babies, are not.
BUT every time I try to personalize the settings and remove those pictures from the settings my computer freezes. So I'm constantly reminded of people and places I love, which is great- kinda- not really.
My computer is psychic and it hates me.
And now, we get to my demands.
As the Extended-Family Calendar creator, I demand to be consulted on any and all future cousin-weddings. I cannot do justice to your anniversaries if you all get married in the same month.
March, June and August are off limits.
You may get married in the same month of your birthday...if you insist.
I suggest February, May, or July. Other months are negotiable.
(I might be teasing)
I will be home 2 weeks from today. Which here means that I will be in Hawaii crashing on someone's couch because my contract doesn't start until January. I will be with my family...after that. The whole date-line thing is really messing with me. I know what it is here. It will be a Monday afternoon and I know I could figure out the days but I'm not sure if that would make any sense because this blog still posts in PST but I'm in...CambodiaST?...and I can't change the settings so that it says 30/11/2012 at 2:30pm instead of 29/11/2012 at 11:30pm without making it go live 15 hours after I post something.
I know that sounds insane, but trust me. I'm right. I've had a lot of time to think about it-- AND I tried it.
But yes. I hope that the world will let me ease into the climate changes. It's 88F here today (55% humidity...oh I feel it). Complaints today said it was 63F in Hawaii. If NV is in the 60s/50s when I get there and UT is in the 50s/40s I think I'll be okay.
I posted on the ICHope Blog about our struggle to create here in cicfo. It's a battle- BUT today Channy came into class and sat down in the desk right in front of me.
"Sister, I write. Once upon a time there was a girl named Sarong and she like to play with the dog."
So we finished our re-telling of Goldilocks and the Three Bears and encouraged them to write me stories like that; stories about each other. Channy and Sarong are really good at it. They had lots of fun. They were able to guess (with exaggerated pronunciation by yours truly) most of the spelling on the words they didn't know, they made jokes that went completely over my head, but I laughed anyway-- got some of it on video for our video montages (which are coming). SreyMey and Monthy are not good at it. They get discouraged and don't really know what to do, they keep asking me what to write. So once Sarong and Channy were done with theirs, I had them pair up with the other two and help them write.
I cannot adequately express how huge this is. I haven't been able to get the little kids writing more than 1 original sentence. They've been holding out on me.
 |
| cute picture instead of awkward segue |
Every 15 minutes my computer screen changes pictures. I have pictures of family, pictures of friends from home, pictures of friends from Hawaii, pictures of the beach, you know normal stuff.
I'd rather not see some of these pictures because a) I can't see them b) I can't be there c) I know I'm missing out on their lives etc etc.
Some of them are fine, like the ones that I've got from when I/we were really little at family reunions.
Some of them, like the ones of my friends that are graduating/going on missions/leaving/having babies, are not.
BUT every time I try to personalize the settings and remove those pictures from the settings my computer freezes. So I'm constantly reminded of people and places I love, which is great- kinda- not really.
My computer is psychic and it hates me.
And now, we get to my demands.
As the Extended-Family Calendar creator, I demand to be consulted on any and all future cousin-weddings. I cannot do justice to your anniversaries if you all get married in the same month.
March, June and August are off limits.
You may get married in the same month of your birthday...if you insist.
I suggest February, May, or July. Other months are negotiable.
(I might be teasing)
I will be home 2 weeks from today. Which here means that I will be in Hawaii crashing on someone's couch because my contract doesn't start until January. I will be with my family...after that. The whole date-line thing is really messing with me. I know what it is here. It will be a Monday afternoon and I know I could figure out the days but I'm not sure if that would make any sense because this blog still posts in PST but I'm in...CambodiaST?...and I can't change the settings so that it says 30/11/2012 at 2:30pm instead of 29/11/2012 at 11:30pm without making it go live 15 hours after I post something.
I know that sounds insane, but trust me. I'm right. I've had a lot of time to think about it-- AND I tried it.
But yes. I hope that the world will let me ease into the climate changes. It's 88F here today (55% humidity...oh I feel it). Complaints today said it was 63F in Hawaii. If NV is in the 60s/50s when I get there and UT is in the 50s/40s I think I'll be okay.
The Cambodian Water festival
Bon Om Touk
That's what it is called. It isn't a celebration of the new year. It may be like that for other countries around Southeast Asia, but not here.
Here it is a grand celebration for the river that changes directions. It's the only river in the world that does so.
I wrote a little bit about it here in the ICHope Blog.
It's short, you can read that. I'm gonna use the same pictures, don't mind me.
So, like I said, the kids spent most of the day getting ready for it. I appeared at CICFO early-ish and figured we'd chill and watch a movie. Not so. I happened to appear while there was a Korean drama going on and those are not to be disturbed. And we didn't want to tire the children too much by having them watch a movie after the drama. They were to take a nap.
...oh...kay...
So we played card games for a bit. Pattica took the older children into one of the rooms and they prepared for the dancing. Not really sure what they were doing, I wasn't in there, but they burned incense sticks. I think they were talking about the history of the dances and/or the passing of the King Father.
Which is why the country didn't have a large celebration.
The country hasn't had a giant water festival in years. Why?
Well in 2010 a bridge collapsed and killed about 400 people. (source, Sophanuth) Apparently the CICFO kids (at least some of them) were very close to the bridge when it happened. Also- it didn't seem like a surprise. Sophanuth says that it looked like it was going to break. It wasn't like the Golden Gate crumbling. Not that it's questionable stability makes in any more or less tragic, I'm just making a note.
Because of the 2010 incident, they didn't hold a festival in 2011.
And now because the country is still in mourning from the death of the old king, there is not one in 2012.
*you know what, I may just put that on my bucket list...if I ever make one...which I probably won't. Why not make a bucket list? Because I plan on just doing things whether or not I expect to.*
But that doesn't mean there is no celebrating. Oh no. The Church celebrates alright. I'm pretty sure that every missionary in Cambodia was at this festival party thing.
So there was a talent show. And my kids were awesome. Hands down, the best. No competition.
I mean, there was that Elder who did some yo-yo tricks.
And then there were some other youth from one of the branches that did a fashion show.
it was more like a here-let-me-walk-down-the-stage-and-pose-3-times thing. odd.
Oooh, there was an adult dancing group that did a traditional peacock dance. That one was actually cool
(I have videos of all these things and I'll upload them sometime. I'll let you know when that is.)
There was this Elder who played the guitar and a sister sang and he did a traditional Khmer song. That was impressive in that our music cultures are so varied that it doesn't really work, but they did it anyway. And then they sang some hymns in Khmer.
But my kids did like 4 different dances and they all were awesome.
I was sitting in the front row with Young Young on my lap, taking videos.
The missionaries passed out food during the beginning of the performance. It was this can that looked like an energy drink but wasn't. It was basically enriched Vitamin C stuff. A pair of small green bananas. And then a sandwich with some cucumber, weird looking meat, and a small bag of julienne carrots and sour krout in that fish oil stuff. I don't know what it is really- probably should've asked- but they sell it in recycled glass bottles. It's slightly yellow and smells slightly of vinegar, but is thicker than that. They put carrots and peanuts in it and it's a spring-roll dip.
It's really good food, just takes some getting used to.
I did wear a dress to this event. The kids told me to. I knew better than to just assume at this point. I rode to the church with the kids in a tuk-tuk. 4 Adults, 7 kids, and 2 boxes of costume stuff. And on our way home we had 2 boxes of food as well.
Talk about sardines.
After the missionaries all sang 'I Am a Child of God' in Khmer, we left. The rest of the audience stayed. They turned their chairs around so that they were facing the chapel instead of the cultural hall. (I don't think I mentioned, the LDS Church-house is built just like the ones you envision. With a stage, and an overflow, and a choir loft, and folding tables under the stage, and basketball hoops inside.) They were going to watch a movie of some sort. We did not stay.
Once we got back to CICFO, Vanneth gave me some of the food to take to Yaya and Sunny. They had not made it to the celebration because they were with their mom, Botevy, who was still pretty sick.
I got rained on while I was heading home. Rain in Cambodia is like rain in Hawaii. It is sudden. Unlike Hawaii, it always pours. It's kinda funny. Everywhere you go there are street vendors, and they always have ponchos for a few hundred reil. I had one in the basket of my bike. When it started to rain, I put mine on, and the streets full of people kinda disappeared. Like they retreated. And then a few minutes later these people crop up with ponchos, traveling with momentum like they'd never stopped. Nobody was on the street for like 20 seconds and then all of the sudden everyone is appropriately dressed.
I still got wet though. And that's okay. It was the water festival.
That's that.
That's what it is called. It isn't a celebration of the new year. It may be like that for other countries around Southeast Asia, but not here.
Here it is a grand celebration for the river that changes directions. It's the only river in the world that does so.
I wrote a little bit about it here in the ICHope Blog.
It's short, you can read that. I'm gonna use the same pictures, don't mind me.
So, like I said, the kids spent most of the day getting ready for it. I appeared at CICFO early-ish and figured we'd chill and watch a movie. Not so. I happened to appear while there was a Korean drama going on and those are not to be disturbed. And we didn't want to tire the children too much by having them watch a movie after the drama. They were to take a nap.
...oh...kay...
So we played card games for a bit. Pattica took the older children into one of the rooms and they prepared for the dancing. Not really sure what they were doing, I wasn't in there, but they burned incense sticks. I think they were talking about the history of the dances and/or the passing of the King Father.
Which is why the country didn't have a large celebration.
The country hasn't had a giant water festival in years. Why?
Well in 2010 a bridge collapsed and killed about 400 people. (source, Sophanuth) Apparently the CICFO kids (at least some of them) were very close to the bridge when it happened. Also- it didn't seem like a surprise. Sophanuth says that it looked like it was going to break. It wasn't like the Golden Gate crumbling. Not that it's questionable stability makes in any more or less tragic, I'm just making a note.
Because of the 2010 incident, they didn't hold a festival in 2011.
And now because the country is still in mourning from the death of the old king, there is not one in 2012.
*you know what, I may just put that on my bucket list...if I ever make one...which I probably won't. Why not make a bucket list? Because I plan on just doing things whether or not I expect to.*
But that doesn't mean there is no celebrating. Oh no. The Church celebrates alright. I'm pretty sure that every missionary in Cambodia was at this festival party thing.
 |
| getting ready |
So there was a talent show. And my kids were awesome. Hands down, the best. No competition.
I mean, there was that Elder who did some yo-yo tricks.
And then there were some other youth from one of the branches that did a fashion show.
it was more like a here-let-me-walk-down-the-stage-and-pose-3-times thing. odd.
Oooh, there was an adult dancing group that did a traditional peacock dance. That one was actually cool
(I have videos of all these things and I'll upload them sometime. I'll let you know when that is.)
There was this Elder who played the guitar and a sister sang and he did a traditional Khmer song. That was impressive in that our music cultures are so varied that it doesn't really work, but they did it anyway. And then they sang some hymns in Khmer.
But my kids did like 4 different dances and they all were awesome.
I was sitting in the front row with Young Young on my lap, taking videos.
The missionaries passed out food during the beginning of the performance. It was this can that looked like an energy drink but wasn't. It was basically enriched Vitamin C stuff. A pair of small green bananas. And then a sandwich with some cucumber, weird looking meat, and a small bag of julienne carrots and sour krout in that fish oil stuff. I don't know what it is really- probably should've asked- but they sell it in recycled glass bottles. It's slightly yellow and smells slightly of vinegar, but is thicker than that. They put carrots and peanuts in it and it's a spring-roll dip.
It's really good food, just takes some getting used to.
I did wear a dress to this event. The kids told me to. I knew better than to just assume at this point. I rode to the church with the kids in a tuk-tuk. 4 Adults, 7 kids, and 2 boxes of costume stuff. And on our way home we had 2 boxes of food as well.
Talk about sardines.
After the missionaries all sang 'I Am a Child of God' in Khmer, we left. The rest of the audience stayed. They turned their chairs around so that they were facing the chapel instead of the cultural hall. (I don't think I mentioned, the LDS Church-house is built just like the ones you envision. With a stage, and an overflow, and a choir loft, and folding tables under the stage, and basketball hoops inside.) They were going to watch a movie of some sort. We did not stay.
Once we got back to CICFO, Vanneth gave me some of the food to take to Yaya and Sunny. They had not made it to the celebration because they were with their mom, Botevy, who was still pretty sick.
I got rained on while I was heading home. Rain in Cambodia is like rain in Hawaii. It is sudden. Unlike Hawaii, it always pours. It's kinda funny. Everywhere you go there are street vendors, and they always have ponchos for a few hundred reil. I had one in the basket of my bike. When it started to rain, I put mine on, and the streets full of people kinda disappeared. Like they retreated. And then a few minutes later these people crop up with ponchos, traveling with momentum like they'd never stopped. Nobody was on the street for like 20 seconds and then all of the sudden everyone is appropriately dressed.
I still got wet though. And that's okay. It was the water festival.
That's that.
Wednesday, November 28, 2012
Khmer traditions
Around the same time as the Water Festival there was a day where the children told me that they were going to stay up until after midnight. They were going to let the moon shine on them because it will bring you good luck. This is another one of those 'would-have-been-huge' parties had the king not died. Still, they held the tradition...just not the fireworks.
Note: I didn't go. It's too late. It's too dark. I don't speak the language. There aren't a bunch of tourists because the holiday was basically 'canceled', so I'd be the only white girl. The family couldn't come with me because Botevy had just barely come home from the hospital.
I saw the moon, it shone on me from the balcony of the town-house, so I got blessings.
The kids go out, there are parties in the street. Around midnight they eat this stuff: it's rice chips. They've been cooked, flattened, and then dried out. Then they put other spices or fruits with it and eat it by the handful for good luck.
They also make lots of noise to keep the ghosts way.
More Khmer Traditions:
Ghosts. They're real. They can be blamed for everything. Families keep a cactus or two in their home to keep them away. It's like a dream-catcher...but a plant.
Bowing. People bow all the time. The cashiers at the grocery store when you're done buying food, the people you greet "Bruep seur", when you come, when you go, when you see an old person, when you see someone you know but can't talk to them, when you buy something, when you refuse to buy something, when you give money to the beggar, when you don't, when you go up and bare your testimony in Church you bow to the branch president and then the congregation, when you give a lesson....
all the time.
Haggling. For everything. Unless it's a chain store. Those are fixed.
When someone dies you wear a black ribbon over your heart until the mourning period is over.
Apsara- these are Cambodian angels. They were carved on the walls of temples in Angkor. They're a common subject for any statues or figurines. They were carved to keep the kings company. The ancient Khmer believed that the kings were gods, so they carved dancing angels to keep them company.
Black ribbons over your heart when you're in morning. People are still wearing them for the late king. Not everybody, but still.
They don't mail things. I asked. They have an absolutely terrible postage system and I can decide if they don't write letters because the system is bad or if the system is bad because they don't write letters.
Note: I didn't go. It's too late. It's too dark. I don't speak the language. There aren't a bunch of tourists because the holiday was basically 'canceled', so I'd be the only white girl. The family couldn't come with me because Botevy had just barely come home from the hospital.
I saw the moon, it shone on me from the balcony of the town-house, so I got blessings.
The kids go out, there are parties in the street. Around midnight they eat this stuff: it's rice chips. They've been cooked, flattened, and then dried out. Then they put other spices or fruits with it and eat it by the handful for good luck.
They also make lots of noise to keep the ghosts way.
More Khmer Traditions:
Ghosts. They're real. They can be blamed for everything. Families keep a cactus or two in their home to keep them away. It's like a dream-catcher...but a plant.
Bowing. People bow all the time. The cashiers at the grocery store when you're done buying food, the people you greet "Bruep seur", when you come, when you go, when you see an old person, when you see someone you know but can't talk to them, when you buy something, when you refuse to buy something, when you give money to the beggar, when you don't, when you go up and bare your testimony in Church you bow to the branch president and then the congregation, when you give a lesson....
all the time.
Haggling. For everything. Unless it's a chain store. Those are fixed.
When someone dies you wear a black ribbon over your heart until the mourning period is over.
Apsara- these are Cambodian angels. They were carved on the walls of temples in Angkor. They're a common subject for any statues or figurines. They were carved to keep the kings company. The ancient Khmer believed that the kings were gods, so they carved dancing angels to keep them company.
They don't mail things. I asked. They have an absolutely terrible postage system and I can decide if they don't write letters because the system is bad or if the system is bad because they don't write letters.
Friday, November 23, 2012
escape to Thailand
The night was young. The internet was out. The power had just come back on after a medium-sized respite.
I was laying on my bed reading my scriptures. Nobody had really been home that day. They were with Botevy in the hospital. She had gallstones. I'd been reading for a few hours when suddenly there was a knock on my door. Soon enough, Sunny came into my room and handed me my passport.
"It didn't work" she said.
Sunny's uncle works for the passport office. That was how I'd gotten my visa before. When my 30-day tourist visa was about to expire for the 2nd time, I sent the money, my passport, and my picture with Sunny to give to her uncle on her way to school. That's how it worked.
Well apparently it didn't.
"Why not?"
"They can not give you a visa again. So tomorrow we go to Thailand in the morning. Maybe 6:30 we wake up and we go. Maybe you bring some moneys for to buy something while we in Thailand."
"Are we going to drive?"
"No. I will call tuktuk tomorrow and we will go to the bus."
So I packed. I didn't plan on staying long in Thailand. At 6am I hear the doorbell. My room is right above the living room. my bedroom windows look out into the high ceiling of the front room. Sortof like a split-level. I always hear the doorbell. It wasn't time to get up yet was it? I mean, the alarm on the phone didn't even go off. I really liked that alarm. "It's time to get up. The time is 6:20am." over and over again. Nokias. No wonder they last so long. But the doorbell was incessant. So I went to get the door. Lo and behold Botevy had called a tuktuk driver for us. So we got ready and left. The sun was rising over the buildings. You could see the dust in the air more clearly as it took on the color of the sunrise. Polluted. But beautiful.
We were on a bus, on our way by 7am. After about 45 min of travel, the bus stopped for breakfast. They have these structures, like a pavilion, and there are people who sell fruit, others who sell roasted eggs on a stick, others who sell packaged snacks, more who sell drinks, and little kitchens next to long tables for those who want bigger meals. Sunny and I got eggs on a stick. Like hardboiled eggs. The girl gave us a bag of salt and pepper mixture to eat with it- because that's how they eat everything. I got a green mango and then we were off again.
Well, for a while. Sunny and I were sitting in the back of the bus because that's where there was room. It was a crowded bus, and the seats were not very comfortable but it was a ride and the countryside is nice.
But then the bus broke down. We were by a little stop on the side of the road. Another pavilion I guess, but on a much smaller scale. Like on I-15 when you hit that truckstop in the middle of nowhere. That's what this is. It was near a river, and there was a big log that lay across it so that people could go relieve themselves if they needed to. The little family that lived here sold packaged snacks and some bottled drinks. We all sat and waited for another bus to come. The people who were bound for a closer destination somehow disappeared. A bus going back the other way took them so that they'd be able to catch a different road I suppose. Sunny and I had a good chat with some girl who is a little bit older than I am. She was very sweet. With her limited English we talked about what she was doing in school but couldn't discuss why she was studying math even though she didn't really like it. It was so very hot, and it seemed like this was a popular hub for breaking vehicles. There was a truck across the way that was stopped. Every now and again somebody would get under it. It wasn't a much traveled road. Mostly busses and trucks. Every now and then you'd get motos carrying something bigger than should be allowed. We saw a few carts pulled by cows pass too.
After a couple hours of waiting, the replacement bus came. It's a beautiful thing. This bus was empty. The seats were much nicer, and the air worked wonderfully. We didn't have any cell service. Sunny was a little bit nervous. Today was the day of Botevy's surgery. We got to Poi Pet around 4pm. Poi Pet is the border town. We paid a moto driver to take us to the passport window things.
There were so many people. Lots of white people. It was odd. I don't see white people very often. It was almost comforting to know that other people spoke English, that is until they opened their mouths. I looked in their hands and their passports are red. And they're speaking Polish. Why? They ARE Polish. Well, I assume some were Russian. They were part of a touring group. Well I made it to the window, and since my visa had already expired they sent me across the street to another building. I payed the fee for the late visa and thought that I was scott free. But then they told me I had to go to Thailand.
I thought I was IN Thailand.
There were two buildings and a Police guy who let me cross the road. Wasn't that the boarder???
Nope. The boarder was down the street a ways. A block or so.
Sunny couldn't come with me. I'm not sure why. So I walked down the road. I asked all the official looking people I saw "Thailand?" and they'd point down the road a little further.
It was rather obvious when I found it. Big red letters "Passport". The light was fading as it does around 5pm. There was a sense of urgency in the whole thing because someone had mentioned that the passport offices closed at 6pm. But the link can't be helped. Here I was again, with all the Polish people. It was very wise of me to bring my mosquito repellant. I used a lot of it.
I stood there in the non-domestic passport line and listened to people who still spoke a completely different language than I did. Suddenly Sunny was there by my side. It was quite remarkable because she had thought that she couldn't come, but there she was. The line was odd. They didn't let us into the barred lines under the pavilion until we'd been standing just outside them for about 15min. Then they let us move forward, and then, because nobody was in the domestic line, they let the tour group go in that line so we would get through faster.
We waited and waited. Since the tour group had to go together, they let the lesser conglomerate go faster, so I got into the actual building and waited in a much shorter line.
In the back of my mind I'd been wondering how much the Thai visa would be. It makes sense to me that I'd have to get a different visa to prove I'd left the country. I mean, Cambodia doesn't let you leave the airport without paying for a visa. Well, I read the signs and I got to the desk and it didn't cost a thing. There was a list of countries on the wall. It had all of them divided by how long they could be in Thailand without a purchased visa. I could have been in Thailand for 15 days and it wouldn't have cost anything passport-wise. Isn't that handy? So I went through that line and got a stamp that says I arrived in Thailand and the date, and left through the door behind the counter.
This led us to another gated line. Like the ones for rides at theme parks.
We weaved our way around and walked a little bit and got into another line, this one was faster, and eventually got a stamp that says I'm leaving Thailand. We made pretty good time. It was almost 6pm. The passport offices DIDN'T close until 8pm.
So we walked back to Cambodia. There is no street sign saying 'This is the boarder', but there is a large Arch that says "Kingdom of Cambodia". I wonder if that structure exists because of the French influence. Arches are big in France. We walk into the official office connected to the arch, and there is basically nobody there. Once I have my visa I go back to the first place, where I crossed the street and thought it was Thailand. And there they stamp my passport again.
In the line I met an American. His name was Alan. He figured I knew what I was doing. Well we all went to the bus station. Alan is sortof a freelance entrepreneur who has decided to sight-see and live in Southeast Asia for the rest of his life. He wanted to go to Siem Reap and Phnom Penh but wasn't very picky about the order. There was a bus leaving for Phnom Penh at 8pm, and it was 7:30. Can you say 'nailed it'?
There was a restaurant next to the station.
I wish I could go into your minds and erase all the connotations that you have stuck in there. This isn't a restaurant like Olive Garden. And this is not a station like Grand Central. It's more like eating under the Pavilion at Girl's Camp, and a small structure with a window where you buy tickets and there aren't enough benches for the people waiting for their buses.
The lady brought us glass cups and a small bucket of ice. She brought out our silverware in a cup of water. She brought us bottled water and napkins. You have to wipe out your cups before you put in the water and ice. You keep silverware in water for sanitation purposes I suppose. If you order food with big chunks of meat, they bring you little rounded plates and a lime half so you can make lime-pepper pasty sauce for it. But I had fried rice.
It was then that I realized it was Thanksgiving.
Never had I been more thankful to be in Cambodia. I'm sure I would have liked Thailand, but I didn't spend very much time there, so it's hard to judge. I was so very thankful that I had a ticket back home. I was thankful for the company of another English speaker. I was thankful for the experiences I had. I was a little overcome. Mine was so starkly different than anything I've ever dreamed up.
But onto the bus.
And they put all 3 white people on the back row or a sold-out trip. We have the longest legs. That doesn't make sense.
The other man's name was Mr Anderson. He is a 63 year old Swedish-born Britain American. It was fun to hear all of his stories about living around the world. He never married. He has lived in Cambodia for 7 years and it's the longest time he's ever lived in a place. He has owned hotels around the world, including Shianoukville where we went to the beach.
The bus started on it's way. Late of course, but no matter. We were crowded and uncomfortable, but the Khmer loved being packed together. They really do. Like sardines.
After about an hour of talking with Mr Anderson, I got into a really lengthy discussion about religion with Alan.
So. many. questions.
And it's here that I learn rather a lot. He didn't know very much about Mormons. He liked Mitt Romney, but didn't know what we have. And it was an incredible missionary opportunity, and I had my scriptures on hand, and I could answer all of his questions; it was a really cool experience.
We stop at another bus stop to get food and drinks or other trinkets. I didn't need anything so I got back to the bus rather quickly. I'm sure that Alan and I could have carried on our conversation about religion for much longer, but Mr Anderson turned to me before Alan returned to the bus. "So I hear you've been having a discussion about religion."
And I'm a bit excited, "Yes, are you religious?"
"No no, quite the opposite. I'm an Atheist."
And he gave his statement on why. "There is such pain in the world, people suffer so much. God, if there was one, would not let that happen."
I can't argue that there isn't suffering. Especially in this part of the world. But oh, what a sad outlook. I talked with him for a bit because it was interesting, but also very sad.
I have a thought. It's from my Intro to Psychotherapy class textbook. "If we are not committed personally to the value of struggling, we will not convince the clients that they should pay the price of their struggle." Gerald Corey. I think God is a therapist.
The roads were bumpy. Alan told me all about Crossfit, of which he is an avid participant. There was a Crossfit training in Singapore that he wanted to go to in January. "Aside from that, I don't have any plans." It was interesting. It passed the time. The roads were too rough to sleep and we were too cramped to do so anyway. I'm pretty sure I got maybe an hour of rest. But eventually we made it to Phnom Penh. Sunny and I got a moto to take us home and I laid down on my bed at 6:10am. Exactly 24 hours since I'd left it.
I was laying on my bed reading my scriptures. Nobody had really been home that day. They were with Botevy in the hospital. She had gallstones. I'd been reading for a few hours when suddenly there was a knock on my door. Soon enough, Sunny came into my room and handed me my passport.
"It didn't work" she said.
Sunny's uncle works for the passport office. That was how I'd gotten my visa before. When my 30-day tourist visa was about to expire for the 2nd time, I sent the money, my passport, and my picture with Sunny to give to her uncle on her way to school. That's how it worked.
Well apparently it didn't.
"Why not?"
"They can not give you a visa again. So tomorrow we go to Thailand in the morning. Maybe 6:30 we wake up and we go. Maybe you bring some moneys for to buy something while we in Thailand."
"Are we going to drive?"
"No. I will call tuktuk tomorrow and we will go to the bus."
So I packed. I didn't plan on staying long in Thailand. At 6am I hear the doorbell. My room is right above the living room. my bedroom windows look out into the high ceiling of the front room. Sortof like a split-level. I always hear the doorbell. It wasn't time to get up yet was it? I mean, the alarm on the phone didn't even go off. I really liked that alarm. "It's time to get up. The time is 6:20am." over and over again. Nokias. No wonder they last so long. But the doorbell was incessant. So I went to get the door. Lo and behold Botevy had called a tuktuk driver for us. So we got ready and left. The sun was rising over the buildings. You could see the dust in the air more clearly as it took on the color of the sunrise. Polluted. But beautiful.
We were on a bus, on our way by 7am. After about 45 min of travel, the bus stopped for breakfast. They have these structures, like a pavilion, and there are people who sell fruit, others who sell roasted eggs on a stick, others who sell packaged snacks, more who sell drinks, and little kitchens next to long tables for those who want bigger meals. Sunny and I got eggs on a stick. Like hardboiled eggs. The girl gave us a bag of salt and pepper mixture to eat with it- because that's how they eat everything. I got a green mango and then we were off again.
Well, for a while. Sunny and I were sitting in the back of the bus because that's where there was room. It was a crowded bus, and the seats were not very comfortable but it was a ride and the countryside is nice.
But then the bus broke down. We were by a little stop on the side of the road. Another pavilion I guess, but on a much smaller scale. Like on I-15 when you hit that truckstop in the middle of nowhere. That's what this is. It was near a river, and there was a big log that lay across it so that people could go relieve themselves if they needed to. The little family that lived here sold packaged snacks and some bottled drinks. We all sat and waited for another bus to come. The people who were bound for a closer destination somehow disappeared. A bus going back the other way took them so that they'd be able to catch a different road I suppose. Sunny and I had a good chat with some girl who is a little bit older than I am. She was very sweet. With her limited English we talked about what she was doing in school but couldn't discuss why she was studying math even though she didn't really like it. It was so very hot, and it seemed like this was a popular hub for breaking vehicles. There was a truck across the way that was stopped. Every now and again somebody would get under it. It wasn't a much traveled road. Mostly busses and trucks. Every now and then you'd get motos carrying something bigger than should be allowed. We saw a few carts pulled by cows pass too.
There were so many people. Lots of white people. It was odd. I don't see white people very often. It was almost comforting to know that other people spoke English, that is until they opened their mouths. I looked in their hands and their passports are red. And they're speaking Polish. Why? They ARE Polish. Well, I assume some were Russian. They were part of a touring group. Well I made it to the window, and since my visa had already expired they sent me across the street to another building. I payed the fee for the late visa and thought that I was scott free. But then they told me I had to go to Thailand.
I thought I was IN Thailand.
There were two buildings and a Police guy who let me cross the road. Wasn't that the boarder???
Nope. The boarder was down the street a ways. A block or so.
Sunny couldn't come with me. I'm not sure why. So I walked down the road. I asked all the official looking people I saw "Thailand?" and they'd point down the road a little further.
It was rather obvious when I found it. Big red letters "Passport". The light was fading as it does around 5pm. There was a sense of urgency in the whole thing because someone had mentioned that the passport offices closed at 6pm. But the link can't be helped. Here I was again, with all the Polish people. It was very wise of me to bring my mosquito repellant. I used a lot of it.
I stood there in the non-domestic passport line and listened to people who still spoke a completely different language than I did. Suddenly Sunny was there by my side. It was quite remarkable because she had thought that she couldn't come, but there she was. The line was odd. They didn't let us into the barred lines under the pavilion until we'd been standing just outside them for about 15min. Then they let us move forward, and then, because nobody was in the domestic line, they let the tour group go in that line so we would get through faster.
We waited and waited. Since the tour group had to go together, they let the lesser conglomerate go faster, so I got into the actual building and waited in a much shorter line.
In the back of my mind I'd been wondering how much the Thai visa would be. It makes sense to me that I'd have to get a different visa to prove I'd left the country. I mean, Cambodia doesn't let you leave the airport without paying for a visa. Well, I read the signs and I got to the desk and it didn't cost a thing. There was a list of countries on the wall. It had all of them divided by how long they could be in Thailand without a purchased visa. I could have been in Thailand for 15 days and it wouldn't have cost anything passport-wise. Isn't that handy? So I went through that line and got a stamp that says I arrived in Thailand and the date, and left through the door behind the counter.
This led us to another gated line. Like the ones for rides at theme parks.
We weaved our way around and walked a little bit and got into another line, this one was faster, and eventually got a stamp that says I'm leaving Thailand. We made pretty good time. It was almost 6pm. The passport offices DIDN'T close until 8pm.
So we walked back to Cambodia. There is no street sign saying 'This is the boarder', but there is a large Arch that says "Kingdom of Cambodia". I wonder if that structure exists because of the French influence. Arches are big in France. We walk into the official office connected to the arch, and there is basically nobody there. Once I have my visa I go back to the first place, where I crossed the street and thought it was Thailand. And there they stamp my passport again.In the line I met an American. His name was Alan. He figured I knew what I was doing. Well we all went to the bus station. Alan is sortof a freelance entrepreneur who has decided to sight-see and live in Southeast Asia for the rest of his life. He wanted to go to Siem Reap and Phnom Penh but wasn't very picky about the order. There was a bus leaving for Phnom Penh at 8pm, and it was 7:30. Can you say 'nailed it'?
There was a restaurant next to the station.
I wish I could go into your minds and erase all the connotations that you have stuck in there. This isn't a restaurant like Olive Garden. And this is not a station like Grand Central. It's more like eating under the Pavilion at Girl's Camp, and a small structure with a window where you buy tickets and there aren't enough benches for the people waiting for their buses.
The lady brought us glass cups and a small bucket of ice. She brought out our silverware in a cup of water. She brought us bottled water and napkins. You have to wipe out your cups before you put in the water and ice. You keep silverware in water for sanitation purposes I suppose. If you order food with big chunks of meat, they bring you little rounded plates and a lime half so you can make lime-pepper pasty sauce for it. But I had fried rice.
It was then that I realized it was Thanksgiving.
Never had I been more thankful to be in Cambodia. I'm sure I would have liked Thailand, but I didn't spend very much time there, so it's hard to judge. I was so very thankful that I had a ticket back home. I was thankful for the company of another English speaker. I was thankful for the experiences I had. I was a little overcome. Mine was so starkly different than anything I've ever dreamed up.
But onto the bus.
And they put all 3 white people on the back row or a sold-out trip. We have the longest legs. That doesn't make sense.
The other man's name was Mr Anderson. He is a 63 year old Swedish-born Britain American. It was fun to hear all of his stories about living around the world. He never married. He has lived in Cambodia for 7 years and it's the longest time he's ever lived in a place. He has owned hotels around the world, including Shianoukville where we went to the beach.
The bus started on it's way. Late of course, but no matter. We were crowded and uncomfortable, but the Khmer loved being packed together. They really do. Like sardines.
After about an hour of talking with Mr Anderson, I got into a really lengthy discussion about religion with Alan.
So. many. questions.
And it's here that I learn rather a lot. He didn't know very much about Mormons. He liked Mitt Romney, but didn't know what we have. And it was an incredible missionary opportunity, and I had my scriptures on hand, and I could answer all of his questions; it was a really cool experience.
We stop at another bus stop to get food and drinks or other trinkets. I didn't need anything so I got back to the bus rather quickly. I'm sure that Alan and I could have carried on our conversation about religion for much longer, but Mr Anderson turned to me before Alan returned to the bus. "So I hear you've been having a discussion about religion."
And I'm a bit excited, "Yes, are you religious?"
"No no, quite the opposite. I'm an Atheist."
And he gave his statement on why. "There is such pain in the world, people suffer so much. God, if there was one, would not let that happen."
I can't argue that there isn't suffering. Especially in this part of the world. But oh, what a sad outlook. I talked with him for a bit because it was interesting, but also very sad.
I have a thought. It's from my Intro to Psychotherapy class textbook. "If we are not committed personally to the value of struggling, we will not convince the clients that they should pay the price of their struggle." Gerald Corey. I think God is a therapist.
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